Fictionary is a column showcasing beauty- and dating-related words that don't exist, but should.
I've long said I could write a much more entertaining dating blog than a beauty blog, but I don't like to share that aspect of my bidness with the world. My personal mantra is that men and math are a damn mystery. But I know I'm not alone when in experiencing a Mantom.
You know. You're dating, you've gone on several great dates, things are great, la la la, and THEN whether or not the relationship or fakelationship warrants a formal breakup (even via text), this dude pulls a total fade-out and you have no idea why. Mantoms are indigenous to Manhattan, where the dating policy of most guys is similar to the way I operate vis-a-vis getting something to eat at an airport. I'll settle (I GUESS) for the Cibo tuna sandwich or the Wendy's spicy chicken. But I keep wondering if there's another gate with better food, so I go on a pilgrimage for ten minutes only to nearly miss my flight and find that the best of the lot was the Cibo tuna sandwich ANYWAY.
Gals--do I even need to ask if you've ever experienced a Mantom? Personally, I've experienced The Mantom of the Opera. Tell me your mantom story in the comments. The Mantom Menace, perhaps?
P.S. How did we live without this word? I came up with it in the shower this weekend and have already used in multiple convos with Dina and Katie.
I've long said I could write a much more entertaining dating blog than a beauty blog, but I don't like to share that aspect of my bidness with the world. My personal mantra is that men and math are a damn mystery. But I know I'm not alone when in experiencing a Mantom.
You know. You're dating, you've gone on several great dates, things are great, la la la, and THEN whether or not the relationship or fakelationship warrants a formal breakup (even via text), this dude pulls a total fade-out and you have no idea why. Mantoms are indigenous to Manhattan, where the dating policy of most guys is similar to the way I operate vis-a-vis getting something to eat at an airport. I'll settle (I GUESS) for the Cibo tuna sandwich or the Wendy's spicy chicken. But I keep wondering if there's another gate with better food, so I go on a pilgrimage for ten minutes only to nearly miss my flight and find that the best of the lot was the Cibo tuna sandwich ANYWAY.
Gals--do I even need to ask if you've ever experienced a Mantom? Personally, I've experienced The Mantom of the Opera. Tell me your mantom story in the comments. The Mantom Menace, perhaps?
P.S. How did we live without this word? I came up with it in the shower this weekend and have already used in multiple convos with Dina and Katie.
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Best. fictionary. ever.
ReplyDeleteI like to call this a "Sopranos Ending." You're going along thinking everything's fine, then POOF! He is a thing that once was and you are left having no idea wtf just happened. I love mantom too -- and before even reading the post, I knew what it was. That's a sign of good fictionary. I'd tell one of my mantom tales, but you know them all already!
ReplyDeleteI always end up with something really bad for me from Au Bon PAIN. You have a gift Glambr xx
ReplyDelete